Mount Sinai was covered with smoke, because the Lord descended on it in fire. The smoke billowed up from it like smoke from a furnace, and the whole mountain trembled violently.
Exodus 19:18
Last year about this time I prayed to see fire. It was a simple, yet specific prayer. Last year was not a particularly good year for me and I needed to know God was listening. I needed to know he cared and that he was still there. Here is a little bit of the backstory behind my prayer. I was reading a book called Playing with Fire by Bianca Olthoff. It’s amazing and I highly recommend it. In the book, she talks about how God frequently showed up as fire in the bible. Remember, the burning bush. And like I said, I wasn’t feeling particularly close to God at this time, so I prayed to see fire. I didn’t just want to see fire, I wanted God’s presence. He felt so distant and I knew something had to change. I gave God some parameters though, I know who do I think I am. I didn’t want anything to be on fire, I just wanted to see fire. No one’s house needed to be set ablaze just for him to answer my prayer. I also gave God a time frame. Yeah, yeah, but I already said I wasn’t in a good place. So many prayers had gone unanswered in that season, alot was riding on this one. So, I needed my prayer to be answered the next day.
The next day came and went. Now, two days later I was standing in the shower thinking about how I didn’t see fire the previous day, but I knew that day I would. I had the blessed assurance that I have sang about, but rarely if ever felt. I had no doubt that I would see fire that day. I finished my shower, got dressed, and walked downstairs to my family singing me Happy Birthday and there was my small fire at the top of a candle. I know what you are thinking, but it wasn’t actually my birthday. This was in July and my birthday is in August. But, since the family was all together on a beach trip, my mom decided to celebrate my birthday early. It’s so much deeper than that and God is such a good God. In that moment, as I looked at the fire I had prayed for, it hit me. I had seen fire the day before, just as I had asked and within all the parameters I had given. But it wasn’t in the form I was expecting so I missed it. The exact same candle had been lit the day before and I saw it, but I didn’t recognize it as the answer to my prayer. My aunt has a July birthday and my mom decided to celebrate her birthday on the day that I had asked God to show me fire. My mom cares more about being with you to celebrate you, so things aren’t always when you assume they would be. God heard my simple prayer and cared enough about me not only to answer it, but teach me a lesson at that same time.
Now, I wonder how many other blessings or answered prayers have I missed because it didn’t look like what I was expecting. Maybe all those prayers in that season didn’t go unanswered, I just wasn’t paying enough attention. So, everyday I try to light a candle. Inviting God to come dwell with me and reminding me to keep my eyes open looking for answers in unexpected places.
Maybe you should add a candle to your quiet time. Praying that God’s presence would come inhabit the flame and stay awhile with you. God bless. I’m praying for you.
Leave me a comment below letting me know how you invite God to dwell with you.
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